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Choosing the right partner

So you are thinking of getting married? That’s a very good idea but have you asked yourself why? Most people would say “I love her or I love him” but I am afraid that’s not enough. There is more to marriage than love. Remember this when choosing the right partner

Marriage is supposed to be an everlasting bond….a union between husband and wife. The vows which are made in the presence of God should not be taken lightly. It is with this in mind, that I would seek to clarify why love although necessary, is not enough to build a good marriage. Have you heard the phrase “marriages are made in heaven”? So why are there so many divorces?

Love can easily be confused with Lust. Love comes from the heart and it is something that grows with the relationship. Love can only be established by taking the time to know each other…. lust on the other hand (as it pertains to relationships), is a desire to satisfy oneself and is triggered by hormones. Lust can cause you to make the wrong decision.

In order to have a successful marriage, there must be some element of compatibility. Spend as much time as possible getting to know your spouse and the family. Here are a few points to consider when choosing the right partner:

• Does your partner have demanding parents? If this is so, you may want to discuss this issue before taking the big step….controlling in-laws may not give you or your spouse the chance to make your own decisions. This is particularly important if you are going to be living close to the parents

• Does your partner have kids? What are they like ….do they get themselves in trouble often? Do they display good manners or are they disrespectful? Some of these kids may have underlying problems which your partner is aware of but decides to hide it.

• What is your partner like….are they the “down to earth” type or do they tell you what you want to hear? There are some partners who would project themselves as the most romantic person in the world, although they know that they don’t even like being held close or kissing.

• Never make it a point to discuss the intimate side of a past relationship with your partner. People usually try to convince you that they are more romantic than your ex lover.

• Do some investigating….find out all you can about your partner, the kids and the family but be tactful about it. Pay special attention to what the majority is saying…..have you seen any Red Flags? A million French men can’t be wrong!

• Observe your partner’s behavior ……does he show aggression when you talk with a friend? Does she ever use expressions like “men gets me sick!” these could be warning signs of what a person is likely to be.

To find out if you and your partner are compatible, take the compatibility test now

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